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03/19/2013

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Karen

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I remember being harassed by my male classmates in middle school. One flashed me during gym class, which frightened and confused me. He also made a point of going out of his way to harass me in other classes as well.

Another time, when word got out that I liked a particular boy, his buddies put him up to sending me a note that said he "liked me only as a friend", complete with a detailed drawing of a very specific part of the male anatomy with the invitation to "bite the big one!" A gesture of "friendship" like that was unforgettable, to say the least, not to mention confusing and frightening - I was only in 7th grade.

I had a frenemy in undergrad who used to make jokes at my expense about my weight and my virginity, even joining in the accusations of my first two boyfriends that it was my fault that our relationships failed. He took great pleasure in hurting me every way he could, and pushed the envelope in lewdness and verbal abuse. I didn't know how to speak up at the time.

I didn't know what to say, or that it was okay to say anything in the first place. I was taught, like so many of us - too many of us - that it isn't okay to speak up about such things, that we have to just put up with it and that, in my case, we deserve it.

There is nothing about that that is even remotely okay.

Cindy

I often wonder if elementary school and junior high school bullies grow up to be high school and college date rapists. Wouldn't surprise me at all.

Sorry for what you had to go through, Karen, and especially that you thought you weren't allowed to speak up. That is a sad story we hear all too often.

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Where's Cindy Singing Next?

  • The Mother, The Consul, Dayton Opera, October 20 & 22, 2018
    http://daytonperformingarts.org/opera-performance/the-consul

Cindy on Stage

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    I play dress-up for a living.

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