After eight months,I can finally start getting back to normal. I can sleep on either side, on my stomach, or my back without experiencing pain. It doesn't hurt to walk.
Eight months, four shows and a couple of concerts later, I finally got the arthoscopic surgery on my torn meniscus, and it feels SO much better. Oh, I still have to be careful for a while, and my doctor's new physician's assistant was unable to be very clear about what activities I can do (he didn't seem to understand how active singing opera can be), but even still stiff and swollen from the surgery, I can tell a big difference. And it's SUCH a relief. There are still problems --- I have arthritis in my knees and hips, and only weight loss is going to help that. But at least I can start to work out again without fear of injuring myself further.
The surgery itself was an interesting experience, very different from my wrist surgery. With the wrist, they gave me some sort of block, and when I got that I felt an ice cold bar scan my body from left to right and then the next thing I knew I was in the recovery room being pestered to breathe. It took a really long time to wake up and I was very groggy. Thanks to the really good meds, I never had any pain. For quite a long time after my surgery, I was very melancholy, crying at the drop of a hat, and filled with a very specific longing to go to a very specific place I'd never actually been before. My poor husband didn't know what to do with me.
This time, once they gave me the Valium (or whatever it was to relax me), I was asleep before we even got into surgery, but when I woke up I was still in the surgery room, fully awake, and hurting. In fact, I started crying because it hurt; but it wasn't just that. I think part of the reason I was crying was relief that it was all over, and I don't mean the surgery --- I mean eight months of struggling to GET surgery. It was a release.
I'd really like to write in depth about my experience with worker's comp, but I think I'll save that until all my medical bills have been paid, thank you very much. I'm just happy to finally have this taken care of and now I am ready to settle in and work on health and fitness in a healthier way than in the past.
In 2008, I made some major changes to my life, including how I ate and worked out and thought about things in general. It had great results, for a while. Then I got busy with life and couldn't devote the amount of time, or the mental real estate, to my health and fitness, that I had been. For a while it was fine, but then it was less fine, and less and less. I thought I'd figured out a program I could stick to for a lifetime, and it turned out that this was not the case. But I've never stopped asking "What now? How do I go on? What's going to work this time?"
I'm in a completely different place, mentally and physically, than I was in 2008. For one thing, I'm stronger physically and despite having gained weight back, in better shape. I overcame Type II Diabetes and haven't been on meds for seven years now. I have more muscle and better endurance. I have the desire to work out regularly, and specific fitness goals --- prior to 2008, it never would have crossed my mind to have eithe rof those. And I know a lot more.
But I still don't know what the magic formula may be. I'm going in for simplicity. Healthier eating --- getting back to what I know is right, from where I slacked off --- and when I can do it, walking. Walking is something I enjoy; I can do it anywhere; and don't need special equipment.
One of these days, though, it's back to P90X for me.