The Next Hundred Pounds

EXERCISING MY OPTIONS

When you travel a lot, you really need workouts you can do in your hotel room. Generally speaking, when on the road and especially in cities conducive to same, I try to walk everywhere. (Boston, New York, parts of San Francisco, Paris … I’m lookin’ at you). Walking and jogging are great, but if you don’t know a city or if the weather is bad or you need to arrive at your destination looking and smelling fresh or if you have to schlep a lot of stuff or if your schedule doesn’t allow for long jaunts at a desirable time of day, your options there may be limited.

Most hotels these days have some sort of little exercise room, but you never know what you’re going to find. Sometimes they’re terrific, state-of-the-art, in which case they are frequently stuffed to the gills with hardcore executive types or bored children. Sometimes they possess nothing more than a decrepit and possibly hazardous treadmill, maybe a low-rent stationary bike or wobbly elliptical, and a few dust-covered weights.  One goes in hoping for the best and expecting the worst.  Same thing with hotel swimming pools. They aren’t generally conducive to laps, and frankly, I have long hair and it’s a hassle to deal with the chlorine, drying, and styling every day.

If you can get a local short-term gym membership, wooo-hooo! I’ve worked for several opera companies that do this for their singers, and it’s a great boon for everybody. Opera companies want fit, healthy, attractive singers; singers want to stay fit, healthy, and attractive. Win-win. But again … the option isn’t always available.  Probably the best thing is if you can join the Y or a franchise that has lots of locations; but I find these too expensive. At home, we belong to a nice little neighborhood gym that is basic, friendly, reasonably priced, and never too crowded.

There’s always stair-climbing. I haven’t tried it, other than taking the stairs whenever possible, mainly because I’m not sure how my knees would handle it. I hurt myself several years ago, doing split squats with a personal trainer standing at my elbow no less, and although they are in good condition now that I’ve lost weight, the injury can reoccur at any time and I am not eager to revisit that. So I just work on strengthening them!

I’m not a huge, huge fan of workout DVDs, but sometimes they are the best alternative available. You can play them on your laptop, if you have DVD capability (and unless you’ve hung on to your dinosaur, most of them now do). During one of my previous weight loss efforts, I subscribed to a service called PushTV, which was semi-customizable. It’s a subscription service in which you choose a trainer and a cardio workout, answer a questionnaire about your fitness level, equipment you have, and any injuries,  choose a genre of music, and get a personalized DVD with two training routines and a cardio routine each month. They get progressively harder month by month, and each DVD has one easier and one slightly harder routine. This is a good product, though not without problems. For one thing, the music absolutely, unequivocally SUCKS and this is a problem if you’re a professional musician who is attuned to these things. It sucks so badly that it’s distracting. Also, the routines don’t always go in time to the music, which is also very irritating to a musician. Secondly, there are a limited number of cardio routines and each cardio trainer only offers one. I really like Petra Kolber’s dance routines, and would have liked to have more of those. Thirdly, even though I specified knee injury, they gave me all sorts of exercises which involved putting pressure directly on the knee, so clearly they weren’t paying all that much attention; and there were no alternatives given. I give PushTV a B-. It’s a great idea, but needs work.

Now, I haven’t ordered any more of Petra’s DVDs, but they’re on my wishlist for cardio workouts. She has a great personality (enthusiasm and energy without the much-dreaded perkiness!) and looks like a real person who happens to be in really, really amazing shape, as opposed to some unattainable plasticized hardbody. Her dance routines are fun and well-explained. If you are, like myself, So Not a Dancer, they’re perfect.

On my friend Twyla’s recommendation, however, I did order the New York City Ballet Complete Workout, Volumes 1 & 2. (Anything Twyla  has vetted usually gets an A plus from me, so one tends to heed her recommendations).  I did the first workout this morning, and I must say that it left me feeling uncommonly well-oiled for the rest of the day, especially during my evening walk, when I found myself taking longer, more energetic strides than usual.

I’ve only done the first workout so far. This is a rather relaxing toning and strengthening routine, perfect for days when you aren’t lifting or don’t want something very active; you’ll still need to do some cardio if you want to burn calories. It wasn’t difficult to follow, if you don’t freak out over the French terms and if you just watch what the dancers are doing --- you may need to rewind to get it all, but after a viewing or two, you’ll have it down. I found it restful because of the classical music and the relatively slow pace. Still, if you’re doing it properly, you are really working the muscles and tendons. If you do this regularly you’ll definitely improve your balance, strength, and muscle tone. I plan on adding it to my regular routine, probably first thing in the morning. It’s a great way to wake up your body and mind, and it will make a terrific addition to my travel bag-o-tricks. You don’t need any special equipment or very much space, and except for one section involving jumps, which could leave a downstairs neighbor wondering who let the elephants upstairs,  it’s a quiet workout to boot.

I’ll report back tomorrow after Workout #2!

THE HUNGRY DACHSHUNDS PRESENT: LENTILS WITH WINE-GLAZED VEGGIES; TOMATO FLAN

One of my goals for fall is to try some new healthy recipes, preferably ones that make plenty and can be used for several meals each. Also, since my husband has become vegetarian, I am trying vegetarian recipes. I don’t mind eating veggie most of the time, especially at home. It’s easy enough to add a chicken breast or some fish if I feel the need for more protein.

Here are a couple of successful recipes I have tried recently. They are from Deborah Madison’s excellent cookbook, Vegetarian Cooking for Everyone. I like them because not only are they tasty, but they are relatively simple, easy, and quick. Although the book itself is quite hefty and therefore could be intimidating, the recipes are explained thoroughly and there are plenty which are very easy; and Madison frequently offers further simplifications and advice on how to serve them. I would recommend it for beginning and advanced cooks alike. It would be an excellent choice for your first foray into vegetarian cooking, and a worthy addition to any serious cook's library.

LENTILS WITH WINE-GLAZED VEGETABLES

1.5 cups of French green lentils, sorted and rinsed
Salt and freshly milled pepper
1 bay leaf
2 tsp olive oil
1 onion, diced
1 large carrot, diced
1 celery rib, diced
1 garlic glove, mashed
1 tbsp tomato paste
2/3 cup dry red wine
2 tsp Dijon mustard
2 tbsp butter or extra virgin olive oil
2 tsp chopped parsley or tarragon

Put the lentils in a saucepan with 3 cups of water, 1 tsp salt, and the bay leaf. Bring to a boil, then lower the heat to a lively simmer and cook until the lentils are tender but still hold a little texture, about 25 minutes.

Meanwhile, heat the oil in a medium skillet. Add the onion, carrot, and celery, and season with ½ tsp salt, and cook over medium-high heat, stirring frequently, until the veggies are browned, about 10 minutes. Add the garlic and tomato paste, cook for 1 minute more, and then add the wine. Bring to a boil and then lower the heat and simmer, covered,  until  the liquid is syrupy and the vegetables are tender, about 10 minutes. Stir in the mustard and add the cooked lentils along with their broth. Simmer until the sauce is mostly reduced, then stir in the butter and season with pepper. Serve with a flourish of freshly chopped parsley.

Cindy’s notes:  I added more garlic, skipped the parsley (of which I am not a fan) and halved the butter. I served it with steamed rainbow chard. This is a very flavorful, hearty recipe! It made the house smell good, and the leftovers are great rolled in a whole wheat tortilla with a little cheese.

 
TENDER TOMATO TART

2 tablespoons olive oil
2 small celery ribs
1 carrot, finely diced
1.5 pounds ripe tomatoes, coarsely chopped
1 onion, finely diced
1 garlic clove, minced
2 tbsp chopped parsley
5 large basil leaves
Tart pastry
Salt and freshly milled pepper
3 eggs, well beaten

Warm the oil in a heavy pot, add the vegetables and herbs, and stew, covered, over low heat for 1 hour. Occasionally give the pot a stir to make sure nothing is sticking, adding a few tablespoons of water if the pot seems dry. Pass the vegetables through a food mill or puree. While they’re cooking, prepare the pastry, line a 9-inch tart pan, and prebake until lightly colored.

Lower the temperature to 400F. Season the puree with ½ tsp salt and a little pepper. Stir in the eggs and taste for salt. Pour the filling into the shell and bake until it appears set and a cake tester comes out clean, 25 to 35 minutes. Let cool for 10 minutes before serving.

Cindy’s Notes: Madison also gives instructions for preparing any of her tart recipes as savory flans, and this is the option I chose out of laziness and the desire for fewer carbs. To turn this into a flan, use a glass or ceramic pan, well buttered, and add more eggs if needed. She also suggests increasing the seasonings by half. I would choose to double or triple the basil and garlic, personally. Also, I did not add more eggs, but next time I would. The flan looked beautiful, but it took much longer to bake than the recommended time --- about an hour and fifteen, and even then it was barely done. There was also a great deal of water in the bottom of the pan, which had to be drained. However, the flavors were good, and it was very light and airy. I made garlic toast, which I then processed into crumbs, and sprinkled them on top for a little crunch; and next time I will probably top it with a little parmesean cheese for added flavor. It reheats well and did remarkably well in my lunchbox! 

WHY YOU SHOULDN’T EAT DESSERT FIRST

Let me begin by admitting that this idea comes to you straight from my dear, wise friend and diet coach, Kim. Kim is a wonderful friend, an amazing writer, and a font of wisdom so deep and witty that every dip therein is a delight. Sadly, she is not currently blogging, but I hope she will remedy that in the near future. Among other things, she is an expert on organization, and Lord knows we could all use more help with that.

Anyway, during our last conversation, Kim told me about something she read about a priest.  He led a very busy life and was often on call for emergencies. When asked how he managed to organize his time, he spoke of constants versus variables.  In other words, he had certain duties that had to be attended to every day; these were constants, and no matter what else happened that day, he knew he would accomplish the constants. What was left, once the constants were taken care of, were the variables.  The emergencies were variables that might knock out other things he needed and wanted to do; but they would not knock out the constants. He did those constants first thing in the morning, before things could get too hectic, before the distractions could set in.

This is nothing more than common sense, but it’s the sort of common sense many of us (jumps up and down, waves hand frantically) routinely ignore. Most of us go through life both figuratively and literally eating dessert first.  And while that makes for a nice treat and refreshing change from your normal routine, if you allow to actually become your routine, well, you’re just asking for trouble. And giant hips.

If we apply the concept of constants vs. variables to our health programs, it’s easy to see that by establishing and attending to our constants, we’re setting ourselves up for success. These are my constants, where my diet is concerned:

1. Create and review a daily food plan.

2. Read my response cards.

3. Schedule exercise.

 
These are the three things I must do if I want to continue being successful with my weight loss, and if I want to maintain it for the rest of my life. I know now, from experience, that if I take the time to write out a food plan the night before, and if I consult it regularly throughout the day, unauthorized and unhealthy items are much less likely to wend their sneaky way into my gaping piehole. I know that if I grab those response cards or make myself stop and really look at my reminder bracelet before the hand approaches the mouth, that’s another barrier to those sneaky foodstuffs  that seem so determined to force their way into my mouth. I know that if I schedule my exercise early in the day and make myself get off my butt and do it, it will be done.

So, moving forward as my metabolism adjusts and the battle of the pounds gets tougher, I am prioritizing those three things. They are my daily constants, along with practicing my music, checking my blood sugar, and staying on top of the bookkeeping (the last three of which have regrettably become variables much of the time). As Dr. Beck says, you have to make time in your schedule for dieting. And sometimes, you have to renew that commitment.

So here is my challenge to myself, and to any readers who want to take it up. As we move into fall, many of us have different schedules. I know I do! I challenge you to sit down this weekend and program time for food planning, cooking, exercise, and all your other constants into your schedule. There is power in writing it down --- you are making a contract with yourself! Put it where you can see it every day.

I also challenge you to think about where you want to be this time next year, especially where you want to be in terms of health and appearance. Write that down, too, in juicy, powerful, audacious words that really mean something to you. Post that where you can see it. Slap some images up there, too, if you feel like it; images that represent your dreams and goals.  Look at it every day, and every day think about what you can do, and what you are doing, to make that dream come true. And feel free to write me and share it. I’ll post it here, if you like. Who knows, maybe your dream will inspire someone else.

One last goal I have for the fall, and that is to try at least one new healthy recipe a week, preferably a “big” something that can last us for several meals. One of our food traps in the past was failing to plan, waiting to eat until we were both starving, not liking anything in the fridge, and going out to eat. Disastrous to both the waistline and the budget! Food planning takes care of a lot of that, but it can get irksome, too. Having a big ol’ pot of something good in the fridge takes some of the strain out of food planning, and it also helps the budget. Stay tuned; I’ll share favorite recipes here.

And now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s time to attend to one of my constants: my standing appointment with my personal trainer!

AUDITION DRESS UPDATE!

For all the lovely ladies who have sympathized with my shopping plight and gave me such good suggestions, I think I may have found The Dress, or one of The Dresses, anyway. (One usually needs more than one audition dress).

The photo doesn’t really do it justice. It’s a very, very simple dress, but not plain. Calvin Klein, ponte knit with just a little stretch, scoop neck, bell sleeves.  They only had it in chocolate brown, which is not normally a color I’d choose for auditions, being more of a jewel tone girl, m’self. But when I tried it on, it’s clear that the simplicity of it, paired with the fit, makes it a great little dress. For auditions, you want your personality and voice to shine. Of course you want to look great, but it’s like having a really great makeup job. If people compliment your makeup, it’s too obvious. If they simply say you look terrific, your makeup is doing its job. Same thing for the dress.

It’s a dress that calls for very understated jewelry (those of you who know me may stop sniggering any time. Those of you who don’t, please to be understanding that I don’t really do understated jewelry. Those statement necklaces that are so popular right now? I’ve been making similar statements for years). I don’t want to look too corporate. But this dress screams for tasteful jewelry, awesome shoes, and an updo (which I also don’t usually do) . Maybe I’ll chance some of the patterned hose or tights that are in this season, with neutral shoes.  I wish I could afford these gorgeous Stuart Weitzmans:

 

Alas, they are a little rich for my blood. Champagne taste and  a beer budget, doncha know.

 
Also, I am very pleased to announce that the last of the Horrid Travel Pounds skulked off as of this morning, and a little bit extra sheepishly exited with it, so that I am at a new all-time low weight. This gives me a last few days of August to excise whatever else might go. And I’ll use the new dress for the September pic. Hips, hips, AWWWWWAAAAAY! 

WHAT THE SKINNY PEOPLE DO

While doing some reading yesterday, I was inspired to come up with a new response card. And it's this:

When I get tired of eating on program, when it seems unfair that I can't eat whatever I want and still be slim, I must remind myself that even slender people watch what they eat. I have a choice: to allow the sense of unfairness and weariness to overwhelm me, so that I eat off-program and gain weight; or to accept that I must eat carefully if I want to be slender and healthy, and enjoy all the many wonderful benefits of my new body and lifestyle.

These are powerful words and thoughts for me. I'm really glad I've been blogging through most of this process, because it gives me a written record to go back and see the challenges presented at each stage of the journey;  where I've fallen down and why; and where I've plowed on through and eventually triumphed. When I'm feeling particularly discouraged, the photo record is really helpful. Sometimes you don't see the changes much day-to-day or even month-to-month, but when I look at my photos from a year ago compared to now I see a dramatic and encouraging difference.

I encourage anyone who is reading this and trying to lose weight themselves to start taking a monthly picture, and to go back and find pics of yourself from previous months.  Make yourself a photo album that you can flip through. And be sure to wear body-skimming clothes so you can really see the changes in yourself.

I also encourage you to keep some sort of diet journal where you note challenges, pitfalls, and triumphs. Note the circumstances, how you felt and what you did. If you’re in this for the long haul, you’re going to come up against these situations again, but you may not remember. Tracking your journey is an enormously helpful tool.

Back to the thought about slender people. I have become a surreptitious food spy, watching different people, what and how they eat. It’s not to judge, you understand; I am observing for my own edification. I am, if you will, spying on the Others. The skinny people.  Stealing their techniques for my own nefarious purposes. Recently, for example, we went to dinner with some friends, and the group included friends-of-friends who we didn’t know.  Most people at the table ate a little bit of everything, but I noticed (even while I was sitting there impatiently waiting for dessert) that one of the heavier people in the group ate the dessert that came with the meal, finished someone else’s, and then had two helpings of a different dessert. A year ago, I would have been doing the same thing.  As it was, I was jealous ‘cause I would have really liked to have a large piece or three. But now I have learned to pass it up, and enjoy a small taste, because all I could think about what was the scale would say the next day, or how my pants would fit, and I did not want to see a negative change in either of those things. So, I savored what I had, and in a little while, I wasn’t thinking about dessert anymore.

This is the difference that I’ve learned from Beck. It’s not that you’re going to be free of temptation and desire, but you learn to get past it, and then it goes away, at least for the moment. It’s going to come back, and then you deal with it again. And the more frequently you say “no”, the easier it gets the next time. This is what skinny people do. They still are tempted to eat junk, or too much, but they don’t do it very often and when they do, they dislike the resulting feeling so much that it deters them from doing it again for a long time. For those of us who battle our food desires, I think we have somehow learned or are naturally inclined to a different reaction, but it can be trained out of us. It’s not easy, quick, or painless, but it can be done.

I’ve been complaining a lot lately about the yo-yoing and gaining weight while in New York and all, and while the scale may not be showing the losses I’d like it to, there are other indications that I’m doing fine.  My husband returned from two weeks in France, and he didn’t think I looked like I’d gained any. For the first time, I recently noticed that my wedding rings are very loose, to the point where it’s annoying to wear them on my fourth finger and I sometimes slip them on my middle finger or leave them off entirely.  And today, slogging away on the elliptical, I noticed that I really needed to tighten the strap on my fanny pack by several inches.

It’s important not to be a slave to the scale. There are other indications of how well you’re doing.  After you’ve been on a program like this for a while, it’s easy to let some of the skills slip. You get overconfident and think you don’t need to do them anymore. I’ve been making a conscious effort to get back to some of the basics, and it’s very helpful. In particular, my response cards. I am making an effort to read them every day and to add new ones. Also, I try to make new lists of advantages of why I should keep on losing weight. Happily, many of the original reasons to lose have been conquered; but there are always new ones! When I started on Beck, those response cards were the single most powerful tool I had. Many’s the time they stopped me from putting something in my mouth.  And you can’t argue with the results.

I think I will always feel like a fat person, no matter what the mirror and the scale say to me. That’s why it’s really important to remind myself regularly that I am thinking more and more like a slender person. The change comes from the inside out. And “fake it ‘til you make it” is more than a cute saying; it really works.

SHAKE IT UP!

So, I need to get out of this craving funk brought on by my disgust over packing the extra  butt-luggage back from New York and two months of yo-yoing. Intellectually, I realize that the cravings will go away as soon as I get busy (and they have … they just keep coming back). So, yesterday I allowed myself a little extra treat at breakfast, and then ate light the rest of the day. I love my yogurt concoction and my favorite salad (spring greens with a little goat cheese, some nuts, and a pear or apple … so yummy you don’t even need dressing!) so much that it’s not burdensome to have those for lunch and dinner after an indulgent breakfast. Also, by having your big meal at breakfast, you have the rest of the day to work it off! So, I also dragged myself to the gym.

Speaking of the gym, it’s getting old again. The elliptical is really the most efficient and least painful way for me to burn some calories, but I’m getting bored with it, and I’m still several weeks away from being able to ride my bike. I’m thinking of finding a class. I’ve never been a big fan of classes, mostly because they have never been geared towards ME, the lowest common denominator, the one who can’t keep up and feels clumsy and huge and clearly doesn’t need to be surrounded by tiny toned bodies jumping up and down in skintight spandex. But maybe, just maybe, it’d be different now. Maybe it’d shake things up a bit. Exercise routines need periodic shaking.

Also, I have a new strategy for getting past these discouraging thoughts. It’s nothing revolutionary. I went shopping.  I tried on lots of clothes that formerly I would not have allowed myself to even look at, because style and size-wise they were off-limits to big ol’ me. I tried on an itsy-bitsy tank top and a body-skimming tee, and they ended up coming to live at my house. I also played around in my closet, reminding myself of how much I’ve thrown out or given away over the past year because it doesn’t fit any more, playing with putting together new outfits I might never have dared wear before.

Obviously one can’t run out for a little retail therapy every time a food craving strikes, but the point is that just reminding yourself of how good you look now can be a great remedy. I also think that allowing myself a little treat helped, because as of today, I’m over it.

A third strategy I’m trying is trying some new recipes. My friend Kim gave us a wonderful vegetarian cookbook. I haven’t been doing much fancy cooking over the summer due mainly to my broken wrist, but now that chopping isn’t a problem, I’m ready to try a couple of new things each week. Today I made egg salad with olive paste, and that’s going to be for lunch. Shaking up the diet isn’t a bad idea either.

I still want that cheeseburger, onion rings, and chocolate shake, but I’ve decided to hold off until after I reach my next little goal, which is about six pounds away. In the meantime, I’m looking into what I can do to give the ol’ metabolism another good shake. I’m thinking maybe Pilates.

WHERE MAH SCALE CANDY?

I’m having one of those weeks when I want to eat everything in sight.

Actually, scratch that. It’s not the food that’s in sight that I want to eat. I want to eat out. I want to have a big luxurious breakfast with a cheese-stuffed omelette and pancakes and all the butter and maple syrup my little heart desires, I want a cheeseburger with onion rings and a thick chocolate shake, I want a decadent ice cream concoction for dinner. I want to bake cookies and eat the dough.

I want to eat good stuff without worrying about the scale.

The problem is, I don’t want to stop losing weight and I certainly don’t want to gain any! It was no joke, saying that this is a lifestyle change and it’s forever. I have no intention of ever going back to eating with total abandon, even for a short time. It can’t be done. The tiger’s tail is firmly in hand.

Sometimes staying on a healthy eating program weighs on you. (Pun intended). It can be, how you say … discouraging. Not discouraging as in “I’m about ready to give up, give in, and spend the morning working my way through the gelato stand in Central Market”, but discouraging as in “Where da hell mah Scale Candy? I’m wanting some Scale Candy, pronto!”

Ah. You are not familiar with the term? Not surprising; I just made it up. Scale Candy, aka Dieter’s Crack, is the pleasurable jolt of a reward you get when you see the number on that scale go down. It’s what makes the suffering and sacrifices worthwhile. And when it’s been a while since you’ve gotten sufficient Scale Candy, well … visions of sugarplums, they do dance in your head. That’s where I am right now. July and August have both been yo-yo months. Ultimately I showed a tiny loss in July and I’m duking it out for August. I had hoped, back in June, to see another significant chunk of weight off by now.

Clearly, I am suffering from sabotaging thoughts, and response cards are warranted.

Sabotaging thought: I’m tired of working so hard to stick to a healthy food plan when it’s so hard to make the weight come off right now. I’d really just like to be able to throw caution to the wind and eat whatever I want to.

Response: You’ve lost 112 pounds – that’s significant. You knew that as you got closer to goal, it was going to get harder. You’ve made a trade of eating too much unhealthy food too often, being uncomfortable in your body, and starting to have some really unpleasant health problems for eating well most of the time while still being able to enjoy some “fun” food, having a fit body that you really enjoy, and reversing those health problems. But if you go back to the old way of eating, the old problems will come back, too. You literally cannot have your cake and eat it, too. You’ve made the right choice. Stick with it.

GIGANTES (THE BEANS, AND MY BUTT)

Did you hear that loud wail this morning? The one that wrapped around the block and shattered some windows and made all the neighborhood dogs howl? Well, that was me getting on the scale back home, and realizing that in a mere four days I had managed to pack on FIVE POUNDS. FIVE POUNDS, people!

Now, travel is always hard on your body, weight-wise. There’s more sodium and hidden fat in restaurant food, you can’t always get the exercise in as vigorously as you’re used to, you retain water, blah blah blah. The fact is, that while I didn’t, as they say, screw the pooch, I was also no food angel, so I guess I am now paying the price. It’s particularly irritating because July was a yo-yo month, and now it looks like August is, too. And I don’t feel that I am anywhere near finished losing. This is just a new and wonderful hurdle I need to get over.

My first impulse was to batten down the hatches and  go back to the 21-day food plan outlined in Dr. Willet’s book. But when I began to re-read the plan, I realized that I really don’t want to. It worked just fine for me when I started this journey, but I prefer the food I’m eating now (yogurt with berries and nuts almost every day for breakfast or another meal; salads for lunch; nuts and fruit for a snack; some lean protein and veggies for dinner).  And thank goodness for my Beck support group. As one member pointed out, I would have had to eat over 15,000 extra calories to gain that much. And as good as the gianyotiko is at Niko’s, I didn’t have that much!

So, for the time being at least, I am simply going to have a light week. I’m going to try to eat at the lower end of my calorie range and keep up the exercise. Tonight I roasted asparagus in a little olive oil with garlic and walnuts, and had it with three big panfried sea scallops, with a pear and piece of Cotswald cheese for dessert. Tomorrow I’m going to try a chard “recipe” that I overheard two ladies discussing in Whole Foods, and some gigantes I’ve got soaking. The recipe I found online requires the following (read it all the way through for the punch line):

Ingredients:
1 lb of gigantes beans
1 bunch of parsley
1 can of diced tomatoes (1 lb)
3 cloves of garlic
1 large onion
1 bunch of thyme (optional)
Salt, Pepper, Olive oil

Equipment:
1 large pot or pressure cooker
1 8”x13” pyrex
Colander
Aluminum foil
One female cook

All set for Girls' Club Gigantes! And all set to get those five gigante pounds back off my butt.

CREME DE LA ... NOT

I hate to disappoint those of you who might be waiting breathlessly for pics of my haul of goodies, post-retail therapy, but Lord and Taylor’s personal shopping service was a complete waste of my time. What a disappointment.

I had emailed the service on Tuesday, requesting an appointment on Thursday or Friday, and received a prompt reply that Vicky, one of their “top personal shoppers” would be in touch with me soon to set up an appointment. In fact, she called my cell phone late Thursday afternoon. I was having some service problems (long story) and was unable to receive voice mail for a couple of hours, and she called during this time. When I got home that evening, there was an email from her saying that my phone did not accept calls and could I please call her to set up an appointment. The email was worded in such a way to seem slightly accusatory --- not “I wasn’t able to reach you by phone”, but “your phone doesn’t accept calls”.  I emailed her back, telling her the problem was resolved and I would like to set up an appointment Friday afternoon; and also phoned first thing in the morning, before 9 am. She returned my call around 12:45 and wanted to know days and times that would be good for me. I reminded her that I had requested a Friday time, but seeing as it was now afternoon I wasn’t sure she could accommodate me. She said, rather defensively, that she had tried to call me the day before. We eventually set an appointment for 4:30 p.m. 

I got to the office just a couple of minutes early, and the pleasant receptionist called Vicky to let her know I was in. She informed me that Vicky was with another client and would be with me shortly. While I waited, the receptionist was carrying on a conversation with another client (???) about what a terrific personal shopper Vicky was. A second personal shopper, who seemed to be just hanging around, chimed in, agreeing. Clearly Vicky was the crème de la crème of personal shoppers, as far as her colleagues were concerned. Good sign, right?

Fifteen minutes later, I wasn’t so sure. There was no sign of Vicky, and I was getting restless. A few minutes later she did pop her head in and advise me to keep reading my magazine; she would be right with me.

Another ten minutes went by. I started looking at my watch. I decided that 25 minutes was really quite long enough to wait, and if she didn’t appear in another five, I was going to walk out. Sure enough, she didn’t show. I stood up and said to the receptionist, in a cordial but unhappy tone, that I would come back another day when Vicky wasn’t so busy. I walked out the door.

A few minutes later, there was a frantic phone call from Vicky on my cell. She apologized and said she was coming to meet me right then. When she appeared, she apologized again and explained that she’d just had a very busy day, and in fact there was another client waiting on her right then, an OLD and LOYAL client who knew how busy she got and was always willing to wait for time with her. The remainder of the time we spent together was peppered with this sort of genteel attempt to “educate” me about her importance as a personal shopper. How in demand she was. How people who were used to using personal shoppers understood that sometimes you just had to wait. Funny how this was not mentioned when she set the appointment. Funny how she assumed I had never used a personal shopping service before (I have).

I accepted her apologies but did not back down or tell her that it was “okay”. I wasn’t hostile, but I did tell her that I have a personal rule not to wait for anyone more than 20 minutes. (I had, in fact, waited almost half an hour).  She seemed a little taken aback by that; thus the attempts to “educate” me.

I explained to her that I was looking for an audition dress, and what that entailed. I made it very clear that cocktail attire was inappropriate, as were sleeveless things. She immediately began to show me cocktail dresses, almost all of which were black. I repeatedly told her that after-5 attire was too fancy; I needed a nice day dress in a material that traveled well. She showed me a horrific Gothic number with a poofy taffeta skirt. She showed me things in satin. She pointed out numerous black cocktail dresses, and kept fingering things swathed in rhinestones. I patiently explained that I really needed a day dress.

She really seemed at a loss. I said that separates would be ok, but all she did was pull two dresses for me to try. One was the poofy Gothic horror. If she is really the ace personal shopper, I would think she would have been able to look at that dress and see that anyone with hips doesn’t need taffeta ruching on the saddlebags. The other was a perfectly serviceable, boring, overpriced black dress. It fit, but it did nothing for me. Vicky was disappointed to hear that I was unimpressed. “Couldn’t you accessorize it?” she asked plaintively.

At this point, it was time to cut my losses. Vicky and I clearly were never going to hit it off; she was clearly distracted and out of ideas; and indeed, there wasn’t much on the floor that was suitable. Most of the dresses out there were black cocktail dresses. L&T 5^th Ave. is clearly not a fan of color when it comes to women’s dresses. Or sleeves, for that matter.  We toured exactly two floors, and by the end of the second one I was thinking, “I can do better than this on my own at Steinmart or Kohl’s.”

After I rejected the second black dress, Vicky pretty much gave up, and I was fine with that. Frankly, I didn’t like her attitude and saw no flashes of her alleged brilliance in shopping. We parted ways , quite relieved to be rid of each other, and I headed off to Starbuck’s to rejuvenate myself. I’m a longtime Lord and Taylor customer, but I won’t be making any special efforts to go there in the near future. I certainly wouldn’t bother with their personal shopping service again. If Vicky represents their best efforts, all I can say is, there’s a lot to be desired.

 

REFLECTIONS

While cleaning up my desk last week, I came across a photo my mother took during my registration for grad school. My last year of undergraduate work had been spent starving myself on a 900 to 1100 calorie-a-day diet consisting largely of popcorn and frozen yogurt, fully abetted and accompanied by my roommate Kellie. We both dropped a lot of weight, going from size 22 to 14, and loved the attention.  I am convinced that my new svelte size was one of the things that helped me win a coveted position in one of the country’s most prestigious opera apprenticeship programs at Chicago Lyric Opera. But thanks to the pressures of grad school far from home, followed by the stressful fishbowl environment of a Young Artist’s Program at a major opera house, the pounds came piling back on. By the time I left the Lyric, I was back up to size 22, and climbing.

Comparing that photo with one from last week, I am surprised to see that I seem to look slimmer now than then. Could it be that I have now surpassed the lowest known weight of my adult life? If so, I am truly moving into uncharted territory, and it feels good. As I write this, I in New York for my regular voice lessons and coachings; this trip, I’ve also scheduled a meeting with a personal shopper so I can look my best for the upcoming audition season. I’ll also be stopping by to say hello to some opera company administrators who I have sung for in the past; this is what I looked like the last time they saw me (well, without the beard, most days) and I am eager to gauge their reaction to the new me. Already, though, I’m noticing some differences in the way men are treating me. There have been two unmistakable flirting incidents in the past couple of weeks (unreciprocated; I’m married to a sexy Frenchman and am therefore unmoved by normal efforts; not to mention that thanks to years of being ignored by most men it takes a great deal to get my attention. I’ll never forget my Phantom of the Opera colleague Gary, an irascible Englishman who had flown with the RAF and been in films in Britain, exclaiming in mock exasperation as we waited backstage for an entrance, “I’m sexually harassing you, darling!”. It was only then that I noticed that the friendly hand on my back had worked its way down to my backside).

  It’s been some months since I’ve been here, and I’m meeting up with some people who haven’t seen me for … oh, fifty pounds or so. The reactions are, to say the least, gratifying. And also amusing, because sometimes people aren’t quite sure how to phrase their congratulations without giving offense, or they aren’t sure comments are welcome. And I appreciate that, because weight is a sticky issue, and I’ve been on the receiving end of both lovely, well-phrased compliments, and well-meaning but awkwardly phrased ones. So, for anyone who’s found themselves in a potentially embarrassing situation, here’s a handy-dandy little guideline:

You don’t need to allude to a person’s former physique (and you especially don’t need to offer an opinion on it) or say any variation of , “Wow, you look SO MUCH BETTER”! It’s not really a compliment if you’re telling the person in the same breath that they look good now, but they used to look like crap.

Just say, “You look terrific.”

Bonus points for any compliment that begins with, “You’ve always looked great, but now …”

I’m just sayin’.

I pigged out a little already on this trip --- a visit to Niko’s, my favorite NY restaurant, is extremely hard to resist. And when I go to Niko’s, there are two constants: there must be taramosalata, and there must be gianyotiko. And there was, oh my yes, there was. There was also seafood moussaka, which came with a lot more sides than I anticipated, and made me wish I’d skipped the taramosalata. In penance today, I ate yogurt and fruit for both breakfast and lunch, and a salad for dinner (pretty yummy penance, if you must know. I did not suffer). I also walked everywhere. By the end of the day I felt back on track. Honestly, I’m gonna have to stay away from my beloved Niko’s unless there is someone there to help me eat all that food!

Tomorrow I’m going for another light eating day with as much walking as I can stuff in. I’ve been trying on clothes in every little snooty boutique I pass, just because I can.

But the best thing about my trip so far is that a very dear friend who I met for dinner tonight told me that she and her girlfriend have both started Beck, she’s dropped 15 pounds already, and she’s made her own reminder bracelets! I’m tickled for her. How cool is that?