DIAGNOSIS: STARLET

In 2004, I was diagnosed with Type II diabetes and was right on track for Metabolic Syndrome. My doctor put me on Atacand and Avandia right away, and I got busy figuring out how soon I could get off them. In my mind, I was too young to be taking a bunch of pills and worrying about my blood sugar levels all the time.

Trips to the nutritionist were depressing. The changes she wanted me to make seemed so drastic. But there wasn't really a choice. I got busy eating better and working out --- specifically, Eric and I started walking twice a day, read some Dr. Weil and switched to organics, cut out processed food and most fast food, and generally ate better. We both dropped weight, and my doctor was estatic at my next appointment, because there were major improvements to my bloodwork.

That lasted for a while, and then there was a stressful, busy fall where I was traveling almost every weekend, and the pounds not only piled back on, but brought friends. Still, Eric and I never went completely back to our old way of eating, and we kept walking. Somewhere along the way, Eric became a vegetarian, so I cut back on meat too, just to make life simpler. To this day I rarely cook meat at home.

In the fall of 2007, I'd suddenly had enough. I found The Beck Diet Solution, started to really educate myself about nutrition, and began to really make changes. Those changes have been chronicled here since 2008. There have been a lot of ups and downs, and that's okay. That's normal.

But around Christmas, I started feeling weird. Unusually fatigued, and overly emotional. Neither is like me. Sure, I'd taken a few weeks off P90X and hadn't done a lot of other exercise, but suddenly I could barely get through a workout --- and I'd been doing it for the better part of a year, and working out regularly for years before that.  You don't just suddenly lose all fitness and conditioning after a relatively short hiatus. Sure, there's ground you have to cover again, but it shouldn't feel like you've never worked out before. I could barely get through walking the Loop, not quite three miles. Something was Wrong.

Well, I've been to the doctor and my gynecologist. I've had an EKG, a complete physical, and a complete blood workup. And the good news is that, apparently, I am in AMAZING health. No sign of the diabetes coming back, cholesterol and blood pressure are great, heart's in great shape. It's not hormonal. I am a-ok (and really, really grateful that it's not the diabetes, which is what I greatly feared).

So what's up, then? Well, the doctors have some theories, but they don't really know for sure. My own theory --- based on feedback from my doctors as well as people who know me well --- is this.

You know how every once in a while, some pop star or Hollywood starlet will get hospitalized for "exhaustion"? I always thought that was a euphemism for "partied too hard" but it seems there's some validity to it. And while the hospital is safe from being invaded by this diva and her entourage of husbands and Dachshunds, apparently what I do need is to relax and take the pressure off for a while.  Looking back, the past year has been pretty stressful, with a lot of running from one project to another with little to no time off.

So long story short, I'm doing a lot better and taking the advice of a dear friend, which is "Stop beating yourself up.  Just keep doing what you can. You'll get back to where you want to be."

I've instituted a couple of self-care practices that are helping, and I walk pretty much every day. I also do my little resistance training routine every day I can manage it. It's an enormous relief to know that my bloodwork looked so great and I'm in good health. And when I am called upon to perform (as I was last week --- a friend asked me to do a charity concert), the performance energy  obliterates any fatigue I'm feeling at the time. It actually gives me a huge boost --- great news since I've got some important gigs coming up.

In some ways, it feels like starting over, but certainly not from square one. Let's call it, instead, regrouping. Refreshing.

And hey, now I've got something in common with Hollywood starlets.  An opera singer can out-diva a starlet any old day, and now I can prove it! ;)

Comments

[Nancy Giguere, RYT-200]

Cindy,
Cindy, Sorry about the link, but you found the right post. As for Ayurveda, I'm no expert, though I do know a little. Please note that although most Kaphas tend to be heavy, not all heavy people are Kaphas, especially today when so many people are overweight. Given that you are "bendy," you may have a lot of Vata--agility and flexibility are characteristic of Vata. In any case, I don't think you should do a highly stimulating practice just now, as that could stress your nervous system and lead to even more fatigue. This is about all I can tell you--I've reached the limit of my "expertise."

[Cindy]

Newme, they did, and in my doctor's words, my thyroid function was "perfect". :)

[NewMe]

I assume they checked your thyroid? High or low?

[Cindy]

DV, that's a great resolution!

Nancy, thank you for the link --- but it took me to a page that said the blog didn't exist! When I clicked on the link for Alignment Yoga, it did take me to a blog, and I think the post you're referencing is the second one down (just in case any other readers want to follow the link).

As a yoga instructor, do you have any thoughts about dosha-balancing yoga? I'm cultivating an interest in Ayurveda, and am interested in trying Kapha-balancing yoga. The little bit of research I've done suggests that a more active form that moves rather quickly through the asanas, while maintaining an upward gaze, is best for Kapha. I'd love to hear your thoughts!

Cindy

[Dalila Valentine]

I am soooo glad you're OK healthwise. I know I can suffer from the opposite problem...spending too much time in the house sitting at a desk doing the same things over and over and spending the weekend taking care of someone elderly and ill, with a small break for my (unpaid) gig as a choir member and soloist. Sometimes this leads to my feeling "tired" and certainly it leads to my feeling depressed although I've been assured I don't have clinical depression because as soon as I have some kind of adventure or outing to look forward to I perk up. So I made it my New Year's resolution to do something that makes me feel exciting, glamorous, and vibrant every day, even if it's something small.

[Nancy Giguere, RYT-200]

Cindy, You may also want to try a relaxing yoga practice that cools the nervous system. This is not so much for keeping in shape as for helping us cultivate a calmer and quieter response to life's stress. (See http://alignmentyoga.blogspot.com/2011/08/new-discussion-in-yoga-world.html) This approach to yoga has changed my life. It's also the kind of yoga I teach. (Full disclosure: I study with this yoga teacher, but I don't get a cut if you visit his blog or buy his book.)