The Next Hundred Pounds

SPRING CLEANING

Depending on who you talk to, cleanses are either a cure-all that make you feel all svelte and alive and spiritual,  or a ridiculous waste of time and money. People who do them regularly rave about how energetic and radiant they feel (well, after getting through the second-day grumps). And it's quite a fad in places like New York City, where an array of companies are lined up to offer you very expensive juices and supplements designed to cleanse you of unspecificed toxins, give your gut a rest from digesting solids, and other "benefits" which many nutritionists and doctors dismiss as bogus. The main benefit to be derived from detox cleanses or fasts is quick weight loss, and if you use it correctly, it can be a sort of jump start to healthier eating. Or you might just yo-yo, if you're not careful.

I did a sort of cleanse --- though it wasn't called that --- before starting Tony Horton's 10 Minute Trainer. It's a part of the nutrition program that comes with the workouts, and it's called the  Two-Day Jumpstart. It's basically a semi-fast; the hardest part is giving up coffee for a couple of days. You have smoothies, green tea, low GI veggie and fruit snacks, and one solid meal a day (a salad with some lean protein, basically).  It's super lowcal and you know, for two days, it's completely doable. I did feel better after having done it, but I also think the effects were mainly psychological. Sure, you're going to lose weight doing it because it's so low-cal, and what you're losing is mainly water weight. But it helps you transition.

I'm thinking about doing one again, before I set off for my next big trip. It'd be nice to feel just a little lighter, a litte more "on my way", so to speak. The inspiration this time is Groupon. An offer came for a juice cleanse, and out of curiosity I checked it out. A three-day supply of fresh juices (six 16 ounce bottles a day) costs $140 normally and was on sale for $69.

Hmm. Well, I have a Vitamix, and I know how to use it. I'm willing to bet that I could stock up on two or three days' worth of cucumbers, celery, parsley, spinach, beets, carrots, lemons, ginger, pears, apples, and cashews for a lot less than $140; and since the Vitamix emulsifies, you don't lose the fiber content and other goodies that you do with juicing.  I'll probably throw in some protein powder, too; and have at least one salad-and-lean protein meal a day. I'll let you know how it goes.

In other news, it looks like Tulsa (my next long-term stop, to sing Marie in The Most Happy Fella) has great cycling trails and is, in general a bike-friendly city; so since I'm driving, I can take the bike! I don't yet know where I'm staying in relationship to where our rehearsals and performances will be , but hopefully I'll be able to get some good rides in. As much as I hate the stationary bike, I do love to ride when I'm actually going somewhere and seeing things.  My goal will be to have lost enough weight that, when I get back in March, I'm in no danger of being over the BMI limit and can have my knee surgery at the surgery center, before my next gig starts in April. With any luck, by then the worker's comp stuff will be ironed out as well; at least, that's what I'm crossing my fingers for.  While my knee is finally doing better (after about two and a half months staying off it, plus a painful cortisone shot), I can really tell that it's not right when I (carefully) work out, stand or walk too much, or go up or down stairs. I have plans to continue being active up until the day I die, so this will not do. Especially with hiking in Montana to look forward to.

Related articles

The Benefits of Juice Cleansing: 4 Myths Debunked

Detoxing? A Guide to Popular Juice Cleanses

Juice Cleanses Don't Work

Juice Cleanses: Healthy or Just Hype?

NO TEARS FOR TWINKIES

You may have no choice but to put down the Twinkie.

The whole world probably knows by now that Hostess Cupcakes,makers of snacks such as Twinkies, Ding-Dongs, Ho-Hos, and Wonder Bread, is going out of business. The 82-year-old company is based in Irving, TX (not too far from Dallas), and has 33 plants, all of which have been closed. 18,500 employees are losing their jobs (why do these things always seem to happen right before the holidays)?

One of the reasons the company is closing is because, according to Reuters,  striking bakery workers refused to agree to an 8% paycut, a 20% increase in healthcare costs, closure of a number of plants, and other changes to benefits. For those 18,500 employees, I feel bad. I hope they find new, better-paying work soon.

But for the death of the Twinkie and the other nutritionally disasatrous junk food Hostess sells, I can't be sorry. Sure, a lot of people have nostalgia associated with the brand name junk that brightened up their school lunch boxes. I certainly ate my share of Twinkies, Ding-Dongs, and Little Debbie snack cakes (which were cheaper than Hostess, as I recall) as a kid. But now, more educated about nutrition, I'm happy to see a junk food brand bite the dust.

Amid all the political arguments about health care, insurance, the economy, and America going to hell in a handbasket, we should rejoice to see the end of sugar and chemical laden crap food. We should continue to press for more education about nutrition, and better availability of real food, especially in schools.

As I sit here and plan my decadent Thanksgiving menu, I think back to the holidays of my childhood, when quite a lot of our food came out of cans and packages. No wonder I didn't like veggies much. They were nasty. Gray, limp asparagus and peas boiled to mush and poured out of a watery can bear no resemblance to their crisp, green, flavorful origins. Sure, I liked green beans, as long as they were drenched in Cream of Mushroom soup topped with a breaded, fried onion concoction or thousands of calories' worth of crumbled up Ritz crackers. Naturally sweet yams, soaked in syrup in their can and topped with more sugar in the form of marshmallows. Nobody really liked the jellied cranberry sauce, squeezed from its can and still bearing the ridges of its container, but we had it anyway, because it was traditional. I never liked mincemeat pie, either, until I made it from scratch and realized that, far from a black cube of unrecognizable stuff which might or might not have contained actual meat, REAL mincemeat is a delicious combination of fruit and spices, and reasonably healthy, too, especially if you cut all but a tiny bit of the sugar the recipes call for.

If I --- a child who grew up on the SAD diet, eating grilled sandwiches made of the cheapest white bread and hunks of Velveeta cheese, who thought Spam was a treat, with a Maryland Club coffee can full of bacon grease on the stove which was used to cook whenever we didn't use Crisco --- if I can re-educate my palate to despise the taste of artificial ingredients and find food that is as close to the way Mother Nature made it the most delicious, anybody can, really. And the more I learn, the more I believe it's not only the healthiest thing, but also the most economically sound and best for the environment and our country sort of thing to do.

So as I plan that decadent Thanksgiving menu, except for a few choice items, I'm taking out extra sugar and substituting lower or no fat products (like yogurt or almond milk for dairy, and apples or bananas for fat in baked goods). I'm experimenting with gluten-free alternatives, since my mom has recently decided to try gluten-free eating and gluten is the latest, greatest nutritional demon. All my decadences will be made from scratch, using high quality ingredients -- no preservatives, artificial colors, or things I can't pronounce. And even if I didn't enjoy cooking gourmet meals from scratch, even if I wanted a much quicker, easier, less messy celebration, it could be easily done without involving chemical shortcuts. Roasting veggies and a turkey, throwing together a great fall salad, whipping up some biscuits ... easy peasy. Even a simple pumpkin pie is actually a pretty healthy and extremely easy dessert!

No plant-manufactured assembly-line snack cakes have passed my threshold or my lips for more years than I can remember, nor shall they. But  if you're a diehard Twinkie fan, don't despair. Someone is sure to buy up the best-selling brands and continue making them. And even if the brand does become extinct, what with all the chemicals and preservatives in Twinkies, you can hoard whatever you can find on the shelves now --- they'll last you the rest of your life, easy. Heck, if you buy enough, your grandkids will be able to eat them.

Of course, I'm hoping your grandkids will have better taste. ;)

IS ORGANIC REALLY BETTER?

 NPR recently reported on a new study from Stanford, published in the Annals of Internal Medicine , which found that there is little evidence that organic food is actually better for you than the average pesticide-laden produce you pick up at the grocery store. The specific conclusion of the study is "The published literature lacks strong evidence that organic foods are significantly more nutritious than conventional foods. Consumption of organic foods may reduce exposure to pesticide residues and antibiotic-resistant bacteria."

People have different reasons for eating organic. I don't eat organic because it might be more nutritious. I eat it because it is not exposed to pesticides and because organic farming techniques are significantly kinder to the environment  and animals than Big Agra-style farming. It also tastes a lot better than produce you get in the grocery store, especially if you buy it from a farmer's market. NPR's article does acknowledge the environmental angle, and also acknowledges that the study in question doesn't look at the longterm or subtler effects that conventional food may have on the body.

Also, the study found that most convential food does not exceed the "allowable limits" of pesticide residue as decreed by the government. Which comforts me not at all, because I don't trust the heavily lobbyist-influenced FDA and USDA to have my best interests at heart. They certainly don't have the best interests of small farmers. The incident linked to smacks of jack-booted thuggery, if you ask me. Toe the company line set by Big Agra or suffer.

But getting back to organics ... is the science behind them, or isn't it? My own admittedly unscientific opinion is that this study is incomplete. I think there are many other factors that come into play, and that the lack of evidence in support of organics' health benefits may simply have to do with them not being sufficiently investigated. Or maybe I'm wrong, and it's just fine to ingest small quantities of bug poison and genetically modified crops, like our government says it is.

The comments section following the NPR article is well worth reading, though. One commenter suggests that when considering this study's validity, we should "follow the money". Stanford, she claims, has received a great deal of money from the Gates Foundation (whose CEO is also on the Stanford Board of Trustees), which in turn has partnered with Monsanto on billion dollar projects. 

Organics are  big business now, but not all organics are created equal. Sure, you can buy organics at Walmart, cheaper than at Whole Foods! But they come from China and other distant places, where production processes are suspect. There's not much point in eating organic food that has to be shipped in from across the planet. Better to buy local, if you can. It's in season and usually tastes better.

Speaking of which, there's a relatively new small farmer's market in my vicinity. I went there last week with my mom and sister-in-law. My haul included some gorgeous oak leaf lettuce (a new-to-me variety, buttery and tender), Boston lettuce, beautiful organic red bell peppers, sweet potatos, and homemade paranthas from a really nice Indian man who was very appreciative of our business. The paranthas went with me to a party that evening, where they were a HUGE hit.

There were some organics, not as many as I would like; but then I am more likely to buy conventional produce at a farmer's market, after speaking to the farmer about their growing practices. Many haven't taken the steps to be certified organic, which I understand is an expensive and time-consuming process; but they don't use pesticides anyway, or use them minimally. And locally grown food is always more environmentally friendly.

And while we're chatting about the health benefits and safety of certain types of food, a couple of weeks ago I heard a very interesting report, also on NPR,  about expired food. Apparently, there are auctions of it, and you can get cases of expired but still edible food for a fraction of the original cost. Of course, this is mostly the typical highly processed stuff you find in inner aisles of the average American grocery store, but if you've gotta get your Cheeto fix and you're not worried about the expiration date, this might be the way to go.

I found it quite informative because like most people, I didn't realize that the so-called expiration dates are not legally required (except for baby formula) and that they are more or less a marketing tool. I confess that I have been known to eat expired food. In the comments section following the NPR article, there's a remark by a chef and former dairy processor  who says, "The rule of thumb that I have always lived by, in good health, is: If you aren't sure whether it is bad, eat it; rotten food is obviously rotten... Please believe me, you will not mistake the taste or smell of rotten food."

Huffpost also has an interesting little article on how long past the sell-by date it's safe to eat certain foods. And here's a whole website devoted to the question of whether you can safely eat your expired can of tuna without inspiring a lengthy worship session at the Church of the Porcelein God.

Bottom line: like anything else, you have to educate yourself about food and nutrition. That includes where your food is coming from. The most recent study is something to keep an eye on, but ultimately it doesn't change my mind.  I'll keep eating organic.

BOCCONCINI CAPRESE, POLENTA WITH SQUASH HASH, GREEN VEGGIE ENCHILADAS, and LIQUID SALAD

One of the joys of finally being home for a stretch of time is getting to do some cooking again.

 

A cute and tasty take on insalata caprese

 

There was no opportunity, alas, to plant a spring garden, and all that came back was weeds and basil. Thank goodness for basil. I've been plucking it by the handful for pestos and delicious side dishes like this colorful version of insalata caprese. Mixed red, yellow, and purple cherry and pear tomatoes (so sweet!), shredded basil, and bocconcini (bite-sized mozzarella balls), drizzled with some fresh Texas olive oil, sprinkled with salt and pepper. Couldn't be easier or more delicious!

 

Polenta - so easy!

 

One night (the day before Grocery Day ... when there wasn't much left in the house) I scrounged around the pantry shelves and found a bag of Bob's Red Mill Corn Grits.  If you're a yuppie, or Italian, you call this polenta. It's very easy to make, and since I can never leave well enough alone, I added my own touch, which was to boil the grits in mushroom broth instead of water, for added flavor, and toss in a big handful of basil.  Here's the recipe:

MUSHROOM BASIL POLENTA

6 cups mushroom broth (or water)
3 tbsp butter (optional; could also use olive oil)
1 tsp sea salt
2 cups corn grits aka polenta
Big ol' handful of shredded fresh basil
1/2 to 1 cup of shredded parmesean cheese

In a heavy, deep pan, boil the broth and salt. Stir in the polenta a little at a time. Reduce the heat and simmer for about half an hour, stirring frequently, until the mixture is very thick. I suggest a long-handled wooden spoon. Add butter if you're using it, basil, and the cheese. Stir well and turn out into a greased pie tin. Let it sit for about 10 minutes; then cut into thick slices and serve hot.

There are lots of ways to enjoy polenta --- traditonally you'd spread a little tomato sauce and sprinkle cheese on top --- but I opted to make a squash hash.

 

Cindy's polenta topped with squash hash

 

The squash hash is also REALLY easy.

EASY SQUASH HASH

1 large zucchini, grated
1 large yellow squash, grated
1 large sweet onion, chopped
2-3 cloves of garlic, diced
Olive oil
Artichoke hearts, chopped
Cherry and pear tomatoes, sliced in half
Smoked mozzarella

Brown the onions in a little olive oil and salt; add the squash and garlic, and cook until most of the moisture is gone and all is nicely browned. Serve over a hot slice of polenta; top with a slice of smoked mozzarella. Let the mozzarella melt; then top with artichoke hearts and tomatoes.

Let me tell you, this dish was a hit at my house. If you're worried about protein, I'd just throw a couple scoops of protein powder into the polenta mix. Or add some black or cannellini beans.

 

Green veggie enchiladas for homemade TexMex goodness!

Determined to get back to my old, good habits of cooking a big dish or two per week (less temptation to run out at the last minute and get something I shouldn't!), I bought the stuff to make enchiladas. It's Hatch chile season here in the southwest, and hubby has been jonsing for some Tex-Mex, which is delicious but can of course be very fatty. What follows here is my lazy version of enchiladas. For extra flavor, I would have grilled the veggies first.

CINDY'S LAZY GREEN VEGGIE ENCHILADAS

1 large zucchini, chopped
1 large yellow squash, chopped
1 large sweet onion, chopped
Garlic cloves to taste, chopped
1 large red bell pepper, chopped
1 package chicken-style seitan (optional)
1 can of Hatch green chiles
2 cans of Hatch green chile enchilada sauce
1 package of fresh corn tortillas
1 cup shredded Colby Jack cheese

Sautee the onions, garlic, pepper, squash, and seitan in a little olive oil and salt, until  most of the moisture is gone and they're nice and brown. Add the canned chiles. In a rectangular pan, pour out a little enchilada sauce; the cover with torn up bits of corn tortilla. Top with veggie mix. Repeat these layers until the pan is full. Top with cheese. Bake at 350 F for about half an hour, or until throroughly heated, with bubbly cheese.

If I were doing a big, nasty, calories-be-damned version, I'd take the time to roll the veggie mix in each corn tortilla, cover with enchilada sauce, and use a whole lot more cheese. By tearing and layering the tortillas, you use less; and by sprinkling cheese on top instead of saturating the whole dish with it, you're saving a lot of calories without sacrificing taste.

 

Or, as I like to call it, Liquid Salad

For breakfast, I've been making lots of green smoothies. It's a great way to get your veggies in at breakfast, and help set up healthy eating for a day when you'll be on the run. There are lots of great recipes out there, but this is my favorite:

 

THE GREEN PINEAPPLE

2 leaves of kale
4-5 mini carrots
1/2 a zucchini
1 scoop vanilla protein powder
1 cup unsweetened almond milk
1 cup frozen pineapple

Throw it all in the Vitamix and blend. If you don't have a Vitamix, you might need to chop the veggies up very well first. Also, if you want it thicker, add a few ice cubes; sweeter, a teaspoon of maple syrup or a little more pineapple. Looks like oobleck but it tastes good and stays with you!

So there you have it. Cookin' up a storm, all of it healthy, cheap, and really, really quick and easy (just what you want in the hot summer time). Enjoy!   

I LIVE FOR OLIVES

Olive oil is a huge industry worldwide, and you might be surprised at who some of the world's biggest consumers are. Globally, 2,000,000 tons of edible oil are produced per year. Spain is the largest producer, followed by Italy and then Greece, but olive are also grown in Portugal, Brazil, Australia, Chile, Turkey, New Zealand, and South Africa ... and of course, the US, increasingly in Arizona, California, and Texas. But the biggest consumer? China, believe it or not. China requires a minimum of 17,000,000 tons edible oil per year, and they are starting to grown trees locally.

The groves at Bella Vista Ranch.

Why this sudden interest in olive oil? A couple of weeks ago, Eric and I toured a local olive grove and oil press called Bella Vista Ranch. The owner, Jack Dougherty, gave a very informative and entertaining lecture about the origins of olive oil and its many uses, the cultivation of trees worldwide but especially in Texas, how olive oil is made, and a lot more. Jack is both knowledgeable and opinionated, and it was fascinating --- and also very beautiful, sitting under the trees amid the olive grove and vineyards, looking out over the Texas Hill Country on a hot July day.The tour ended in the tasting room, where we enjoyed samples of Jack's grassy, peppery olive oil and several of his wines. We went home with a few bottles of each!

Don't let the hat fool you. Jack looks like a good ol' boy but he's a Naturalized Texan, from California. Well, he's here now, so that's what counts. ;)

One of the things I found most interesting, of course, were the health benefits of olive oil. Of course, it's no news that it's one of the healthy oils. It's a monounsaturated fat, which can help control your cholesterol levels and normalize blood clotting.  But what I didn't know previously was that olive oil contains a phytonutrient called oleocanthal, which imitates the effect of ibuprofen, reducing inflammation. And among its other benefits as a natural anti-inflammatory, it may be able to decrease the risk of breast and lung cancer. It's also rich in antioxidants, which help lower the risk of several types of cancer. The anti-inflammatory properties also have benefits for other diseases, including stroke, heart disease, arthritis, and some dementias. 

And olive oil has recently been tied to studies suggesting that a Mediterrenean diet (which is rich in olive oil) significantly lowers the risk of Type II diabetes --- by almost 50%, compared to a low-fat diet. Olive oil contains a hormone called adiponectin, which helps regulate blood sugar levels.

Of course, it's still a fat, and therefore high in calories, so it should be used judiciously. But isn't it impressive that one tree, and one tiny fruit, could produce so many health benefits? Furthermore, considering that raw olives are inedible (they contain capsaicin, the compound found in chilis that makes them hot, and will burn your mouth if you taste one straight off the tree), it's rather surprising that ancient people figured out how to cure and eat them. The history is really fascinating.

As long as we're talking about healthy oils, I've recently become enamoured of cooking with coconut oil, a healthy and natural saturated fat. Try cooking your scrambled eggs in a tiny bit of it --- YUM! Among its benefits, coconut oil can join olive oil in boasting a good influence on heart health, Type II diabetes, the immune system, metabolism, and weight loss. I recently bought two big jars from a place called Tropical Traditions, and have been very happy with it. It's a much better deal than what you get in the store! 

As if olive and coconut oils didn't do enough for us, they are also GREAT for your skin and hair. Years ago, one of the makeup artists at Chicago Lyric Opera told me that her greatest beauty secret was olive oil, which she used as a moisturizer on her face (she had gorgeous skin). It also works well as a deep conditioner for your hair, and helps control dandruff. Coconut oil is also great for your skin --- it's full of Vitamin E and fatty acids, which have anti-oxidizing and anti-bacterial properties. It's great for giving your hair some extra shine, or for treating dry, damaged hair; and it's especially good for Black hair.

By the way, we ended our trip to the Hill Country with a stop at the beautiful Italian restaurant, Trattoria Lisina, where we started a delicious meal with a dark green, deeply fruity olive oil and some really yummy bread for dipping.  Thanks to the high calorie and carb content, that's not an everyday treat, but we sure did enjoy it!

KICKINGS OF THE BUTTS

Here is a great story about a great kid who has taken on not only the nutritionally questionable lunches her Scottish school serves, but the politicians who tried to shut her up. Nine-year-old Martha Payne has a blog called Never Seconds. Every day she takes a photo of her lunch and writes about it. It's not always questionable --- sometimes she quite enjoys it --- but she is quite the health conscious young lady. Her blog has gotten quite a bit of press, which annoyed the authorities, who didn't take kindly to criticism of the school's food. They forbade Martha to photograph her food or even bring a camera to school. But Martha has a lot of fans --- among them celebrity chef Jamie Oliver, famous for championing reforms in school food -- and has prevailed! You can read about the whole brou-ha-ha by clicking the link above. (Incidentally, young Martha has also used her blog's following to raise awareness and funds for Mary's Meals, a UK- based charity that sets up school feeding projects globally. Some kid, right?).

Meanwhile, back in the States, I went to my Fit Club pals and appealed for an intervention. (Fit Club is a private FaceBook group, composed largely of other performers, to provide support and encouragement for each person's pursuit of health). I hadn't posted there in a while because frankly, my eating here in Princeton has been, overall, terrible. No one really had anything new to offer, but that's beside the point --- sometimes, you just need someone to tell you to put down the Twinkie, get off your butt, and get back to work. Lovingly, of course. Sometimes, you just need someone to tell you again what you already know, much in the way kids like to hear the same bedtime stories again and again.

I needed a butt-kicking, for sure.

One thing I figured out a long time ago is that for me to exercise regularly, it's got to be convenient and it's got to be interesting. And also, that it's got to come to me in a pre-formulated plan. When it comes to workouts, I need a boss to tell me what to do and how much of it to do.  That's why things like P90X and classes at the gym, or personal training, have worked so well for me in the past.
I guess I've just already got so much going on in my life that I have to be in charge of and make lots of minute decisions about; when it comes to workouts, I just want to show up and do the work I'm given. There's a gym in the house where I'm staying right now. I could go down there and lift weights, do some time on the elliptical. But I'm bored with that and besides, I want to know exactly what I should do. I liked the High Intensity Interval training I did with Harrison a few weeks ago; I'd love to find an online program for that.

The same is true for food. The Beck Diet Solution did wonders for me but at some point its magic wore off, and I have never been able to get wholly back on the program. I always said I did not want to count calories or points, but now I'm wondering if it's time to try that again, or if I should stick to my guns and simply go back to what I know worked in the past.

Questions I don't have answers for right now. But today, I am grateful for friends who offer up gentle butt kickings and advice on request, and it did help. I've done better the last couple of days.  And for now, I think the important thing is not to figure out THE plan, but A plan for tomorrow.

So. That's what I'll do.

 

 

 

I STOP WHEN I'M DONE

When you start something new, it's really tempting, really easy to make grandiose plans. (New Year's Resolutions, anyone)? You're going to cut out all processed and fast food overnight! Henceforth you will never drink a real Coke or have a Big Mac again (even though you currently average three or four a week). You're going to get up at 4 a.m. every day and run 10K! You're going to stop going out for beers with your co-workers every night ... well, you'll go, but you're only going to drink diet soda!

And most of us know how well THAT turns out. We manage our stringent new curriculum for a short time, and then it gets to be a drag. There's a special occasion, or a night out when you're tired, or a morning when it's rainy and you have a big presentation, so it becomes easy to let your resolutions slide, just this once.  Somehow, just this once turns into rationalizations and more slips and before you know it, you've completely abandoned your shiny new regime. You feel worse than before, because now you feel guilty, and are probably indulging in all kinds of negative self-talk about your lack of willpower.

Why set yourself up for this kind of failure? Have we learned nothing from the fable of the Tortoise and the Hare? Slow and steady wins the race. Have we learned nothing from the Winter Warlock in Santa Claus is Coming to Town? Put one foot in front of the other ... Perserverence, not perfection, is the goal.

This article from Paleo nutritionist Diana Rogers illustrates the point beautifully; and although she's specifically talking about making the changes to a Paleo lifestyle it really applies to any lifestyle and diet changes you want to make. It's much more effective to make them in increments, and to be true to the philosophy you are ostensibly embracing, rather than simply trying to replace your old, bad habits with "healthier" versions. This isn't reality TV! Nobody expects you to be an instant expert, or instantly successful! You can take your time, make mistakes, start over as often as it takes.

I would add to Rogers' words of wisdom ---perhaps unpopularly, but I am absolutely convicted of this idea --- that it is also important to take the time to discover, step by step what you can and will do on a longterm basis, even if it means you're only embracing your new philosophy 75 or 80%. That may change over time. You may find yourself willing and able to do more. It may be what you crave.

I feel I am finally emerging, after a period of some months, from my slide back down the mountain path that is my lifelong journey to best health and fitness. I finally feel capable again of a firm and steady commitment to working out (a lot!) and to challenging myself more physically. And as I've gotten stronger again in that capacity, I also have come to feel that I can begin to pay stricter attention to diet. But I am easing back in to both. Exercise came first; it's less of a mental hurdle.

Back in 2007, when I first decided to make major changes to my lifestyle, I knew this effort had to be different than any that had come before, and that it was crucial to do it MY way. After all, I'd had all the expert advice in the world. It wasn't that I didn't know how to eat properly or work out. Something else was lacking. There is no program in the world that you can stick to slavishly exactly come scritto, as we say in opera --- as written; at least not forever. It's important that you individualize it and make it work for you, and don't apologize for doing so.

Do, however, be honest with yourself. Let's face it, you are not going to lose 100 pounds if you say to yourself, "I can live with exercising for thirty minutes three times a week, and having a salad for lunch every day along with my can of Coke and bag of Cheetos." Certainly, you will see some improvement, but you're probably not going to become a cover model for Fitness Magazine. Be honest about what you are doing for exercise, how much effort you are actually putting in,  and how much good it's doing you. A thirty minute walk per day is not going to "pay" for half a pint of ice cream and fried chicken for dinner. Be honest about what you are eating, and how much. The simple act of teaching yourself to weigh and measure food, to understand portion sizes and nutrition, and to make sure you ARE aware of how much and what quality of food you're putting into your body, will help you make better choices. Maybe not every time, but more of the time, if you are serious about improving your health.

But take your time. That's okay. When you feel good, when you feel secure in your new habits, when you maybe start to feel that you need something more, harder, different, that's the time to kick it up a notch.

And that's the place, at long last, that I find myself coming back to on my own fitness journey. Yeah, I've been here before. I may well end up here again. Not going to worry about it. Today, in TRX class, I did those damn planks. I held them the whole time. The lady next to me, who does Crossfit, was having just as hard a time as I was, and she weighs less and is in better condition. Today, after a hard hour of kickboxing, I joined my TRX classmates in 50 jumping jacks at the start of class. I was TIRED. I was drenched in sweat from the first class, and we had an hour to go. I got to #30 and thought I was going to have to stop, but I remembered a poster I'd seen the night before.  It read:

I DON'T STOP WHEN I'M TIRED. I STOP WHEN I'M DONE.

Today, finally, I was in the right mental place to push a little. I kept repeating that to myself throughout class. And I did all 50 jumping jacks. And then I went and did those hateful, hateful planks. Three weeks ago, it wouldn't have happened. But I showed up, I did the work, and even when I hated it, I started to like it.

I need a nap now, but I figure today, I earned it.

PRIMAL FLIRTING

Yesterday, I stopped off at a Wendy's to ...er ... use the facilities. It was like entering the Bog of Eternal Stench. I was nearly bowled over by the smell of rancid grease and preservative-laden food. When I recovered a  bit, I looked around and realized that none of the patrons were affected by it. It seemed perfectly normal to them. And once again, I realized that once you cleanse your palate and your body of this kind of trash, you become aware of just how awful it really is.

Several years ago, I did this great gig in Minnesota ... in February. They put us up in beautiful lofts right next door to the rehearsal space. It was sort of the Opera Dorm for grown-ups, and the cast had lots of fun doing potlucks in each other's flats. The last one was a sort of "clear out your fridge" party, and one of my friends brought Hot Pockets, cut up into bite-sized pieces. They smelled pretty good so I decided to try one ... and spit it out into the garbage. It didn't even taste like food to me. (At that point, I probably hadn't had any fast or processed food for about two years).

My point is, you really can re-educate your tastebuds to prefer whole and natural foods, and less sugar. I personally have never conquered the satanic trifecta that is fat-sugar-salt, but I need a lot less of it to be happy. This is on my mind because at last, after three months in Florida, working hard on regaining fitness and the mental strength to concentrate on diet, I feel ready to cautiously introduce some changes to my diet again. And it's party inspired by Mr. Hot Pockets.

Mr. Hot Pockets lives here in Miami, and I saw him the other day. Actually, I worked with him just last summer, and there'd be significant changes to his physique. My friend has a compact, muscular frame, the kind where a few pounds  and a little toning one way or the other make a big difference.  He has never been fat, but he used to weigh a little more, and now he's looking positively sleek. He's doing Primal, Paleo's slightly more relaxed cousin, and I've been intrigued by these for a while. I first heard about Paleo because of CrossFit (many CrossFit adherents are also into Paleo), and it led me on an exploration of these very low-carb diets that eschew grains (even whole grains!), legumes, and processed sugar. The good news? Fat  --- good fat --- isn't the enemy any more. Here, eat the chicken skin. Have a whole avocado. Slather on some coconut oil. EAT BACON!

This is an oversimplification of course, and not a full view of the diet or the lifestyle in its many incarnations. I encourage you to check out some of the links above if you're interested, and they link to many other books and sites.  Personally, I don't think I'm ready to go whole hog (you should forgive the pun) and start foraging, cooking organ meats, and fasting intermittantly, but giving up grains for at least a week? That I can do. I think.  Yesterday was grain-free (I did have some legumes), so technically today is Day One. So far, so good.

I was late to kickboxing this morning, but I joined in with gusto and also did my TRX class. Tonight I plan to go back and do a stretch/burn class. Yesterday, it was zumba and a great 75 minute yoga class all to myself, since no one else showed up!

I was late to kickboxing because  since Daniel's death, I have just been a little spacey, and yesterday was the funeral in France, so that was all that was on my mind. I drove around all day singing "Danny Boy" and had a little private ceremony of my own for him. My voice teacher sent me a link to  my favorite movement from the Faure Requiem --- "In Paradisium", as ethereal and promising as you could wish for, and it made me remember an incident that happened almost ten years ago, when my own father died. I was performing my favorite work of all time, the Verdi Requiem. It's a challenging work with a lot of solos for the mezzo; the last of which requires high, delicate singing after an evening of heavy lifting. But it's the most beautiful thing in the whole work, in my opinion: the Lux Aeterna.

We were in a hall that had stadium seating. When we started the Lux Aeterna, I happened to glance up into the audience, and I saw my father. Not a guy who looked like my dad, not a ghost, but my dad, right there in the audience. The next time I looked he was gone, but I knew he was still there, and it was very comforting. Now here's the weird part: after the concert, one of the choristers came up to me. I did not know this woman, and as far as I know, she had no idea my dad had died just a few weeks earlier. She said to me, "While you were singing the Lux Aeterna, you were surrounded by angels. And I saw your dad standing there. He looked very happy."

This is a recording of that very performance. I have done other, better performances since then, but this one will always be special to me. I now offer it in tribute to Daniel.

EATING HEALTHY IN THE HOSPITAL

I'm happy to say that I've never had to stay overnight in a hospital (knock on wood!). My one surgery was an outpatient procedure that had me home in time for dinner. But this post from PrimalGirl really got me thinking --- what would/should/could someone who is determined to eat healthy do if they were required to spend a few days in the hospital?

Hospital food is a joke ---  literally and figuratively. It's true that many hospitals have, in recent years, made efforts to offer healthier meals to their patients and employees. In researching this post, I came across several menus that sounded pretty decent, nutritionally and gastronomically. For example check out the menus at Bronson Methodist in Kalamazoo, MI. There's plenty of commerical goo on the menu (sugary name brand cereals, margarine instead of real butter, the ubiquitous Jello) , but you can also find healthy, fresh choices like salads, fresh fruit, and grilled chicken.

But my guess is that if you find yourself at a less-wealthy hospital, or a military hospital as PrimalGirl describes, you might be stuck with sad --- nay, tragic ---  Standard American Diet choices, with most selections heavily processed and injected with who knows what --- not healthy, not tasty, and not appealing.

Now, if you're really sick or injured, food is unlikely to be foremost on your mind anyway. But it still shudders me to think about being forced to ingest chicken bouillon which contains no actual chicken (but plenty of salt --- witness the ingredient list on Hormel's salt with chicken flavor chicken bouillon cubes) , Jello (gelatin --- aka collagen extracted from animal bones, connective tissue, and skin; artificial colors and flavors, and lots of sugar), reconstituted juices, eggs made from a powder, and other such delicacies. I mean, the whole idea is to get well, right?

So if you find yourself in a situation where you yourself can't go out and get healthy food, or if you are on a very specific diet (vegan, Paleo, what have you) what can you do?

PrimalGirl has some great suggestions. Here are mine:

1. LIE LIKE A CHEAP RUG  about having  allergies to any foods you wish to avoid (dairy, gluten, soy, etc.) --- but still check the ingredient list on what you're served.

2. Be prepared to compromise on quality; go for the best nutrition you can get at the moment and don't worry too much.

3. Avoid the stuff you wouldn't eat on the outside. Turn down the processed stuff.

4. Request whole foods: whole fruit, plain, unseasoned pieces of meat (you can add your own seasoning to taste), fresh vegetables and salads without seasoning or dressing, whole grains. You may have to request a special meal, but don't be shy.

5. Get a loved one to bring you supplies. They may be able to bring you healthy food from home, but if they can't be there for every meal time, ask for a small cooler where you can easily store yogurt, hard-boiled eggs, low-fat cheese, carrots and hummus, and other healthy snacks for a few days. Ice should be readily available. You can also stockpile peanut butter, apples, and protein bars. In other words, food you could travel with.

Lest this seem like overthinking, or obessessive behavior, or just a little much, my take is this: it takes a tremendous amount of commitment and focus to stick to a healthy eating plan. It's so ridiculously easy to get thrown off. I have a lot of friends who are singers, and are committed to special diets, often out of necessity. Our bodies are our instruments, and we have to take care of them. We travel a lot, and it's often just as hard to find good, healthy food, especially that which fits a restricted diet --- on an airplane or in an airport, in a foreign country, in a host's home, at a fancy dinner party where you're a guest of honor, or in any strange town where you don't have cooking/storage facilities, or reliable transportation.

It would be very easy to throw up your hands and have that fast food cheeseburger just this once. The problem is, not only is it bad-tasting and bad for you, but it makes it easier to give in the next time. And garbage in = garbage out --- poor quality food is not going to help you heal or make you feel better.

So stick to your guns, even when you're down. If nothing else, you'll leave a beautiful corpse!

INSPIRATION AND BURNING

One finds inspiration where one may. I was inspired by this poster from The Rogue Cookie,
whose FaceBook page features funny and inspiring graphics. (I just wish they didn't have to rag on vegetarians; they're a Paleo-friendly site if not downright Paleo. Can't we all just get along)?

I also loved this,  from Cave Girl Eats; I may not espouse the Paleo thing 100% but the basics make a lot of sense and are doable by anybody.

Awesome! We all need reminding, especially when somebody brought doughnuts to work or your mom just made her famous chocolate cake filled with deep-fried Twinkies or you just would kill for a gallon of ice cream and a big spoon and a dark closet to eat it in. I'm going to print these out and carry them around as part of my new little collection of reminders, along with my "Just for Today" mantra.

Saturday was a double workout day: Ballet Barre Burn and TRX Suspension Bands. Wow! My quads are a little cranky but my shoulders and upper back are WEEPING today. Weeping, I tell you.

Barre workouts are one of the latest fitness crazes, but here's a little secret: you don't need a barre to do a lot of them. The back of a chair will do.  The focus is on ballet training moves to tone and strengthen while giving you a long, lean look; but our class moved at such a fast pace that there was plenty of cardio and sweat going on. My only complaint was that there was not sufficient stretching before or after the class. In the future, I'll get there early enough to do some warming up on my own. We did some fast-paced jumping jacks , knee kicks, and a move they call "locamotive" in P90x (it involves putting your hands behind your head and bringing opposite knees to elbows) to warm up, and then it was an hour of leg lifts, squats, calf raises, work with resistance bands (standard stuff like bicep curls, rows, and presses), and a little mat work for core at the end. It was challenging and fun, and a good full-body workout. There are a lot of studios offering barre workouts, and there may even be classes at your local gym. Pure Barre, Barre Fitness, and Barre3 Fitness are a few of the pro studios; and there are also lots of DVDs you can try.

After class, I went next door to a nice little vegetarian cafe which advertised smoothies. It smelled great and several of the instructors from the gym were in there, having snacks. I grabbed a menu and had just started to salivate when I saw the prices --- EIGHT BUCKS for a smoothie? Yikes! No wonder all those girls are so skinny; they can't afford to eat much. I hightailed it out of there and down the street to the Starbucks, where you can get a perfectly decent, healthy smoothie for $4.25.

The second class of the day was TRX Suspension Bands. These are long nylon bands with handles at the end, which attach via D-clip to a beam on the ceiling ,over a door frame (with the door shut), to playground equipment, tree limbs, fences, etc. --- anything that's sturdy enough to hold your body weight. They were originally developed for the Navy Seals and the really cool thing about them is that they use your own body weight for resistance.

I loved this class! It was tough, especially since I was already tired from doing Barre Burn, but I got through it just fine. We started off with more cardio and did plyo breaks throughout the workout. Almost everybody in the class was new to the bands, but they are really easy to figure out and use, especially if you already have some fitness knowledge about good form and so on. It's also very easy to adjust the resistance, by moving closer to or further from the point where they are hanging. We did fast, energetic bicep curls, presses, squats, butt lifts --- every muscle got a workout. I was dripping with sweat and DONE when it was over, but it was terrific and I can't wait to go again.

I love that I can see all the classes online and plot out what I want to take --- especially since I don't know my schedule more than 24 hours in advance. I can go ahead and reserve, and then cancel if it turns out I won't be able to make a class. Tonight, I'm going to take it easy and do yoga --- all that stretching should feel really good.

It's really exciting to have the time and place to concentrate on intensive workouts again for a while. It's only a short time, unfortunately, but it's giving me a great kickstart. Hopefully I'll lose some weight, get toned up, and when I move on to my next singing adventure --- back to beautiful Princeton in June --- I will find something else. Back to P90X and biking, perhaps. However, this does inspire me to want to find a gym with great classes for the times I am home. I thought sadly that I had lost my taste for working out, was sliding permanently back into sloth, but now I realize that not only did I really need a little time off (Christmas break) and a little time to ease back in (Sarasota); but when I do have the time and easy access, I'll do it with gusto. Another lesson --- do what you can, when you can, and forget about the rest.